Since J started school we have quite a few of his classmates back to play and stay for tea once or twice. We also have had his best friend back many times. J has been to his best friend’s house many times in return and things work out fairly evenly. Aside from his best friend, we have had 4 children back to play on a total of 5 occasions. All the play dates seemed to go well and there were no major problems. My son still plays with the children concerned at school, although not necessarily every day in every case.
I’d kind of assumed that J would be invited back to these children’s homes in due course, but it hasn’t happened generally. Out of the 5 play dates, he’s been invited back once. Sometimes I know that it can be difficult to fit a return invite in with busy days and after school activities. There may be family commitments that get in the way. However, I had expected that he would be invited back more than 20% of the time. If we accepted an invitation, I’d expect to return the favour within a month or two. I’d have thought that was the unspoken rule. It’s proved a bit awkward a few times when J has asked when he can go to so and so’s house and I’ve had to say that we have to wait to be invited.
I do wonder if we are being taken advantage of sometimes. We probably aren’t and have just got a bit unlucky. It has made me more reluctant to invite new children home though, as I don’t want J to get disappointed about not going back to that child’s house. I’m not sure what I can do about it. Should I invite the same children again? Should I only invite new children that haven’t been invited before? Should I avoid inviting anybody (apart from his best friend)? What do you think?